Brigitte Part III

With her niece Annkathrin and her nephew Phillipp in Martinhagen, 1997

In 1997 we made a big trip. Actually it started a bit with a problem. Brigitte had heard a lot about Hawaii and wanted to go there. I had to attend the EAJS conference in Budapest in early September, and then we were invited to our friends Shawn and Reiko Morrisf wedding in Wellesley near Boston in late August, and of course, we also were under pressure to see our relatives in Hessen. Then we found out that a round-the-world ticket from Nagoya stopping in Honolulu (including a round-trip to Maui), San Francisco, Boston, Frankfurt and Budapest, and then going back to Osaka via Amsterdam, would cost only about half the price of a roundtrip to Budapest for me. Thatfs what we did, we spent one week on Maui, one week in Boston, then we went to Frankfurt and I spent one week in Hessen before I went to Budapest, while Brigitte spent another week in Fritzlar. We then met again in Amsterdam and returned together to Osaka.

On Maui, Hawaii, 1997

In our hotel in San Francisco, 1997

In the Muir Woods, California, 1997

At Shawn and Reiko's wedding, Wellesley, Mass., 1997

With her nephew and godson Philipp in Martinhagen, 1997

With he brother Heinrich and her sister-in-law Susanne at my parents' Golden Wedding in Fritzlar, 1997

In the beer garden of the Shinjuku Gyoen Park in Tokyo, 1997

With Nakamura Hiroko in Tokyo, 1997

Mit Carmen Knuelle in Hiroshima, 1997

Nagoya, 1997

With my parents and my sister Dagmar in Fritzlar, in front of my parents' house, 1998

With my father in Fritzlar, 1998

With her niece Annkathrin, her nephew Phillipp, and my father at her brother's place in Martinhagen, 1998

With Annkathrin in Martinhagen, 1998

In the Provence, 1998

In the Provence, 1998

In the Provence, 1998

In Sausset-les-Pins, Provence, 1998. Other people used to have a grand cafe creme in the morning and pastis in the afternoon. Brigitte did it in reverse.

With her brother Hans in Sausset-les-Pins, Provence, 1998.

With Michele et Michel Renou and Daniel Baticle in Cassis, Provence, 1998.

In the Augustiner Keller, Muenchen, 1998

With my cousins Dirk and Annette Hillenhagen and her friend Reiko Kobayashi in Muenchen, 1998

With Dirk and Annette at the Starnberger See, Muenchen, 1998

With my cousin Annette in the Augustiner Keller, Muenchen, 1998

With her friend Reiko Kobayashi, Muenchen, 1998

Skiing in Nagano Prevecture, presumably 1999. The only time she went skiing. The date printed on the picture says February 21, 1996, but I think the date in Mutsuo's camera was not correctly set. She went one more time skiing with Mutsuo, but that was a cross-country tour.

Shima Peninsula, presumably 1999

Party at Tanakas' place in Kozoji, 1998 or 1999

After 1997, Brigtte developed three special groups of friends in Nagoya. The first group evolved out of her German courses at the Open College at Chukyo University that she started to teach in 2007, if I remember well. The second group evolved out of her five years of teaching at Mie University, and the third group consisted of female specialist for German literature. There were other activities too, here network of Japanese friends was actually quite larger than the three groups mentioned above, but those groups held an important position in Brigittefs network.

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Open College

Deutsch Stammtisch at Mie University, 2000

Deutsch Stammtisch at Mie University, 2000

Deutsch Stammtisch at Mie University, 2000

Deutsch Stammtisch at Mie University, 2000

With me and my sister Dagmar at my sister's house in Fritzlar, 2000

On Bali, 2000

On Bali, 2000

On Bali, 2000

With my cousins Dirk and Annette Hillenhagen on Bali, 2000

With Dirk on Bali, 2000

On her birthday 2001

On her birthday 2001

2002

With Mutsuo Ohkawa, 2002

With Tezuka Kazuo, Ise, 2003

2003

On her birthday 2003, in the back: Yasuko Yamada and Mari Tamura, in the front: Mr. Muraura and Mutsuo Ohkawa

German Weekend 2003

German Weekend 2004

2004

With Mr. and Ms. Yanagizawa, July 18, 2004

Brigitte had complained about strange seizures and headaches since the end of June 2004. Mutsuo Ohkawa and I had been urging her to get a neurological examination, she didnft want to, but Mutsuo found a female neurologist near Issha station, and when she had another seizure on July 10 that lasted for 30 minutes and she was unable to stop the gas for the water she had put on the range to make tea, she finally agreed to see the doctor. From July 8 to 13, 2004 Marafiki had a group exhibition at Gallery Jin. On July 12, Brigitte went to see the neurologist, but she didnft want me to accompany her, and went with Mutsuo Ohkawa instead. I was waiting at Gallery Jin. A group of Brigittefs friends from Open College had arrived to see the exhibition, and when they were just about to leave, Brigitte came. She was devastated. The CT scan of her head had shown some abnormality in her brain, it could be a tumor, it could be a lesion, that was not clear, but it was the most probable cause for her seizures. The doctor immediately organized a more thorough examination at the Nagoya No. 2 Red Cross Hospital in Yagoto for the next day. Again Brigitte did not want me to accompany her; she went with Mutsuo Suzuki instead, because he had some medical background. On July 13 she spent the whole day at the hospital; it became clear, that she had a brain tumor and that she should have surgery immediately. She entered hospital on July 22 and on July 27 she had surgery. Everything went well; she was able to recognize me after surgery and to move her fingers and toes. She spent until September 17 in the hospital undergoing chemotherapy and radiation therapy. The therapy was effective, the regular MRI examinations over the next few months didnft show any new tumor growth, and in October Brigitte restarted teaching German. She was also allowed to drive again.

At the Nagoya No. 2 Red Cross Hospital in Yagoto, August 2004

At the Nagoya No. 2 Red Cross Hospital in Yagoto, August 2004

At the Nagoya No. 2 Red Cross Hospital in Yagoto, September 2004

At the Nagoya No. 2 Red Cross Hospital in Yagoto, September 2004

At the Nagoya No. 2 Red Cross Hospital in Yagoto, September 2004

Back home, September 2004

November 2004

November 2004

November 2004

November 2004

December 2004

December 2004

December 2004

December 2004

December 2004

December 2004

December 2004

December 2004

December 2004

December 2004

Christmas 2004

With Will Hardwick and Theodore VanMeter (Tip) during the opening party for the exhibition "Elles" at Pelican Petes', February 2005

With Will Hardwick during the opening party for the exhibition "Elles" at Pelican Petes', February 2005

Things looked good, and in February Brigitte wanted to go to Europe, but she did not want to visit only family and friends, but to see something new. Spain or Italy was on her mind. After discussing the weather conditions, we decided to go to Firenze. We arrived in Frankfurt on February 27 and met our friends Johannes and Gisela. The next day we flew to Firenze. But nothing went as planned. When we arrived at Central Japan International Airport, we found out that Brigittefs re-entry permit had expired, but she received a one-time re-entry permit at the airport. And when we arrived in Frankfurt, Europe was hit by a wave of extremely cold weather and snow. The next day our flight to Firenze was redirected to Bologna and we were then transported with a bus to Firenze. Brigitte liked Firenze, but she did not feel well and couldnft really enjoy it. We even contemplated to cut our trip short and return to Japan early, but Brigitte wanted to go on. On March 5 we were back in Frankfurt and traveled to Fritzlar, where we stayed with my sister. We met my parents and her brothers and she recuperated a bit. But then on March 11 when we visited her parental home in Holzburg and met her aunt and godmother, the last sister of her father, she had a grave seizure that lasted for several hours. In the next two days at my sisterfs she recovered considerably and wanted to go on with the last leg of our trip, Muenchen, on March 14, were she wanted to see my cousins and her friend Reiko. Then our train was delayed and information in Muenchen was wrong and when we arrived at Muenchen central station, Reiko and Annette who had been there to welcome us, had returned home. We made it to our hotel, only to find out that it was in the process of being renovated. There had been a booking error from the side of the hotel group. They had prepared a room for us, but the whole place was stinking of paint and was noisy with the renovation work. I immediately contacted our booking agency in Hamburg, and within 10 minutes we were placed in a different hotel of the same group, where finally an hour later Annette caught up with us. We spent several quiet days in Muenchen, but we had to cancel our plan to go to the opera, because Brigitte had become extremely sensitive with noise. We spent her birthday with Dirk, Annette, and Reiko, and she was happy. On March 20 we were back in Nagoya. The doctors gave her new medication and plans were made for a new kind of treatment. In the first few days she recovered day by day, but then recovery stopped, and on April 1 I had to cancel all her classes. She still had hoped and planned a hanami for April 10, but on April 8 she had another crisis and we brought her to the hospital. The MRIs revealed a sudden and explosive re-growth of the tumor that had already spread to the whole brain, the diagnosis was terminal and she had to stay at the hospital. On April 15 she lost consciousness, and at 2:25 a.m. on April 20 she died. During the whole time of her illness we had the strong support and help of all our friends in Nagoya, especially of Michiko Mikura, Mutsuo Ohkawa, Mutsuo Suzuki, and Mr. and Ms. Yanagizawa, who also helped with all the formalities and organizational problems of the funeral and Brigittefs Farewell Party in May.

Firenze, March 2005

Firenze, March 2005

Firenze, March 2005

Frankfurt Airport, March 2005

With me and my siter Dagmar in Fritzlar, March 2005

With me and my parents in Fritzlar, March 2005

On the train to Muenchen, March 2005

Muenchen, March 2005

Muenchen, March 2005

With Annette and Dirk on her last birthday, Muenchen, March 15, 2005

Nagoya, April 20, 2005

Brigitte and I were together for twenty-two years. Those were essentially twenty-two good years. We loved and admired each other. We had our fights, but neither of us did hold grudges, and most times we were quickly able to mend fences. But Brigitte also had a hidden vicious streak of ruthless egoism. If she wanted something or someone badly, she sometimes simply went ahead and took it, without any concern how much grief and distress she might cause to the people around her. This streak was the cause of our more serious fights. Fortunately it didnft happen very often. But from 2002 on some of her actions started not only to slowly destroy our relationship, they also caused considerable grief and distress to some third-party people well beyond Brigittefs death.